THE HIGHEST SINGLE DIGIT IN THE DECIMAL SYSTEM

Richard (of RBB) raised an interesting question in a recent post. He asked "Why can't I see my willy?"
Oh, hold on, no that's not it He resigned himself to that problem a long time ago. Just a moment ... dum de dum de dum... here it is.. he asked "Why are there Seven Deadly Sins?" or something stupid like that. Well, I'm not the bloody pope nor am I the editor of The Tablet but I'll give the answer a go. It is because. Enough said OK. You gotta have faith as that sodomite George Michael said (why has he got two Christian names? He gives us a bad reputation). But, I digress. As I was browsing through the book section in the Petone St Vincent de Paul's shop and as the best pages were torn out, or gummed together in the books I was 'researching' - Mandingo, Lady Chatterly's Lover, Lolita, The Little Boy's Guide to the Catechism -  I began to think a little more of Richard's question. Pedalling back home I came up with some sins and commandments more relevant to our daily lives:

1.  Thou shalt not flush the toilet or wash the dishes whilst someone else is in the shower (unless you don't like them).
2.  Thou shalt not eat someone else's lunch that they have left in he communal fridge at work (sneak a bite or one of the sandwiches if they are unlikely to notice)
3. Thou shalt replace the toilet role if you used up the last of the toilet paper
4.  Thou shalt indicate correctly when turning left or right or, at a roundabout if going straight ahead.
5. Thou shalt, at a fast food counter or indeed at any counter including hotel check-ins or check-outs, anticipate in advance what goods or services you require and promptly and courteously conduct the transaction.
6. Thou shalt if returning to your car parked on the street or in a car-park, enter and move away as quickly as possible. Do not sit there adding up the till receipt, applying make-up or otherwise being a nuisance if there is someone else wanting the space.
7. Thou shalt when driving on the open road keep to the left and, if you are a slow driver do not speed up at passing lanes.
8. Thou shalt not answer your cellphone during a film at the picture theatre nor conduct loud conversations nor consume any noisy or smelly foodstuffs.
9. Thou shalt not make disparaging, rude or blasphemous comments on my other blog if I decide to start it up again.

I will call these nine pieces of advice the Nine Nice Neologisms.

Go in peace and please let me know what happened on page 127 to 135 of Lady Chatterly's Lover.